The Pockets – Series 2 | by Nanda Wanninayaka– Nanda Wanninayaka

Multipockets: Good morning, Mr. President. Mr. Double Pockets wants to see you.

Pocket Billiards: I see, what seems to be the problem with him now?

Multipockets: Education!

Pocket Billiards: Isn’t it too late now to do anything about it? He has already “mustered” some sort of degree from Kelaniya Tertiary Montessori, hasn’t he? How can we undo that now?

Multipockets: No! No!! No!!! I mean the education of the entire nation.

Pocket Billiards: It’s too late for that as well. They shredded the whitepaper I drafted and … … …

Multipockets: Please, Mr. President. Can we be a little constructive here? This guy is desperate. Let’s help this guy out. He seems desperate and has already been the butt of the joke of the students, teachers, public, and the teachers’ unions.

Pocket Billiards: I understand you. Okay, get him down here along with that Drag Queen of his. She is the Minister of Education, after all, right? Looks like he doesn’t have anybody else who knows how to read and write in his cabinet full of bogus doctorates.

Multipockets: Yes, you cannot count on anybody else in his camp, and he thinks she is the only one with a proper doctorate, at the rate he is discovering how many claims they have doctorates and other post-secondary qualifications.

Pocket Billiards: Yes, yes, yes. Get them down here, even though they didn’t want to learn anything from Cashew Nut Grandpa, not very long ago.

***************************************************************************

Double Pockets: Hi, Mr. Pocket Billiards, … … …

Pocket Billiards: Sorry, you have to call me Mr. President, Mr. President. That is how they call former presidents in America.

Double Pockets: Okay, Mr. President, Mr. President! … … …

Pocket Billiards: Already complicated stuff, huh? What seems to be the trouble with you, Mr. President?

Double Pockets: Mr. President, Mr. President, Our Drag Queen tried to reform education in Paradise Island and now has messed it up wholesale. Everybody says she has copied and pasted from your so-called white paper and some recent fellows’ reforms. What can we do about this, Mr. President, Mr. President?

Pocket Billiards: Reforming education is a long process, Mr. President. You have to plan it well and get the expert support, and then publish it as a white paper for discussions, and… … …

Double Pockets: Hell, No! Don’t even mention white papers! Our trade-unionist turned Deputy Minister of Labor has made a fool of himself in the House by trying to tell the House what a white paper is. Can we proceed without that term, please, Mr. President, Mr. President?

Pocket Billiards: Well, who do you need to reform education for? Your party was dead against my reforms in 1981. I understand that you now want to implement more or less the same, I hear.

Drag Queen: You can tell the same for everything else we do, can’t you? Well, what I want is to introduce sex education in school in the pretext of reforms.

Pocket Billiards: I see! I get the point, I am not against sex education as long as it limits itself to facts of life, learning about their bodies, minds, and feelings with the hormonal changes…, but not sex positions of gay and lesbian techniques.

Drag Queen: No! No!! No!!! They can learn those in school bathrooms, can’t they? Like we did.

Pocket Billiards: Did you, Drag Queen? Mr. President, I am sure it is high time you appointed a new Minister of Education.

More Stories